The only way that I felt free from it was when I took it to the cross and released it to God. I tried to put a Band-Aid on it and move on but that Band-Aid was just a temporary fix. It kept coming off. Jesus is the only fix. He understands our brokenness. He understands our weaknesses. It’s when I kneeled down before him humbling myself earnestly, wholeheartedly to him and crying out to him. Daddy, God to take my pain away and heal my brokenness. I instantly became like that neglected child that was longing for love that finally found love. I finally felt accepted and that’s what everyone wants to feel like in any relationship. And like any relationship, the deeper I got into it, the more I wanted to know about Jesus. So I started getting hungry for the Word of God. And I finally realize that it is true that the Word of God is alive in me because the Holy Spirit lives in me. His word is sharper than any double-edged sword. And because of the abuse I went through as a child opened doors of darkness that I have to know the word to defend myself against the evil one. Even psychologist are now saying that victims of child abuse experience more paranormal activity than people who were never abused. I know there have been times I have seen angels and demons. It’s the word of God that rebukes those demons and sends them away. It’s the word God that makes me able to stand back up on my two feet.
Ephesians 6:12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.
If the devil knows our weaknesses he’s going to use them against us.
Hebrews 4:12 For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.
Ephesians 6:16 In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. 17 Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.
This verse is my sword Philippians 4:6 Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. 7 Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.
This verse promises to give me peace in my heart and mind as I live in Christ Jesus. This to me means that Jesus will take my anxiety, my brokenness and turn it all into peace.
We can’t start to live a normal life until we receive peace from the past.
I think I mentioned before. I had a little relapse when I saw the movie The Shack. I saw that blood on the floor of the cabin and it reminded me when I came home from the hospital after getting hit by a car that was orchestrated by my brother and neighborhood kids. That blood in the cabin took me back to seeing my own blood on the street as my dad was driving me home. I could see the bloodstained street.
My weapon against those thoughts became: Philippians 4:7 and the peace of God that transcends all understand will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.
We have to know the word of God to be able to face those flaming arrows of the evil one.
If you know someone that has suffered abuse, please share my story with them.
#Sibling Sexual Abuse
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